My Best Friends

My best friends mean everything to me. They are probably the most important people in my life after my immediate family. I love them, I would do anything for them. But sometimes I feel like they don't see that. I feel like they are my best friend, but I'm not theirs. Many times over, I have been rejected, neglected, lied to, ignored, and have been unimportant to my friends and that makes me feel really bad. I just feel like I treat my friends so good, I'm so great to them, and they just don't reciprocate, not even a little. I don't ask for much as a friend, I just ask that you show me what I demonstrate to you all the time. It makes me feel like shit, and I don't think my friends are supposed to make me feel like shit, right? I just wish that when I say "I love you" to a friend, he or she says it back. I just wish that my best friends would show me that I'm their best friend to. I just wish they would show me they cared.... :(

Why?

Things do not always work out the way you want them to...they just don't. I have a problem, and its a really big problem...I am in love. That's the problem. I am in love with someone whom i can never be with. What i want to know is why? Why do I have to suffer, while he likes somebody else. Why does he have to give his heart to someone else when I have given him mine. Why can't he see that i would treat him so great, and the girls he likes just wont treat him the same. It is really sad for me...

The good thing about all this is that I have him in my life. He's always going to be there, and I don't want to lose that. I love him more than he knows, and i want to keep it that way. I want him to be as happy as I can make him from the position I occupy in his life. And if he gets that happiness by me helping him get him the girl he likes, so be it. I will suffer and get hurt, but hes happy and that is what is most important to me. As long as me and him can stay best friends the way we are now, forever, I'm ok with that. Even if I have to cry myself to sleep every night, wondering why this had to happen to me. Even if I have to be there, seeing the guy I love be with a girl, suffering with a knot in my throat, I'll do it. I would do it all for him.

I just wish that one day, he could see how much i love him, and how much i desire for him to be with me. Because maybe, just maybe, it might happen. Why you ask? Because life is full of surprises.